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Dad: Your 11 to 15 Year Old is Asking Critical Questions

"In a young boy's development, there comes a crucial time when the father must intervene. It arrives early in adolescence, somewhere between the ages of eleven and fifteen, depending on the boy. If that intervention does not happen, the boy is set up for disaster; the next window that opens in his soul is sexuality." - Wild at Heart by John Eldredge, page 90

Dads: What are you doing to engage the hearts of your sons at a soul level? What are you doing to shape their identity and answer their core question, "Do I have what it takes?" If you don't answer or speak to it, where will your silence lead the heart of your son?

Parents, Don't Get Caught Napping

Coach Tony Dungy has a daily "All Pro Dad" email that I subscribe to. A recent post included this quote from MTV's founder and former president.

Bob Pittman, founder and former president of MTV, made a startling admission in the Philadelphia Inquirer, "The strongest appeal you can make is emotionally. If you can get the kids' emotions going, make them forget their logic, you've got them. At MTV, we don't shoot for the 14-year olds, we own them." 

This was a bold reminder to me that there is more going on in television programming than entertainment. There is strategy, psychology and profitability at play, and my kids are the target. This is not only true of MTV, but can be found in most products and entertainment marketed to consumers.

It would be easy to bash MTV or scream "foul" or point a finger, but that's not the point. The point isn't, "What is someone else doing to to capture the heart and mind of my children?" The point is, "What am I doing to capture the heart and mind of my children?"

This is a good wake up call to pay attention.

Keep a cool head. Stay alert. The Devil is poised to pounce, and would like nothing better than to catch you napping. Keep your guard up. 1 Peter 5:8 (The Message)

Talking To Your Kids About Sexuality

Culture will bombard our kids with all kinds of distorted messages about gender, sexuality and sex. Survey playground chatter at school or catch a Disney sitcom, and you’ll learn quickly that even our elementary-aged children are exposed to entertainment charged with sensuality and laced with innuendo. When it comes to sexuality and our children, don’t you want to be their information source first?

Many find it difficult to talk with their kids about sexuality, because their parents did not talk to them about it. But all of us learned about it somewhere from someone or something. God has given parents the responsibility and the privilege to teach their children about sexuality and God’s gift of sex given to a husband and wife. It is His idea and His gift. Our children should know God's created intent for sex.

Kim and I are finding the God's Design for Sex series (Navpress) very helpful in teaching our children (10 & 7) about God’s plan for their sexuality, as well as answering their questions about sex. We are confident that you will find them helpful guides and encourage you and your spouse to check them out for yourselves.

Book 1 | Ages 3 to 5
The Story of Me  (God's Design For Sex)

Book 2 | Ages 5 to 8
Before I Was Born (God's Design For Sex)

Book 3 | Ages 8 to 11
What's The Big Deal? Why God Cares About Sex (God's Design For Sex)

Book 4 | Ages 11 to 14
Facing The Facts: The Truth About Sex and You (God's Design For Sex)

Happy Father's Day!

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord. Ephesians 6:4 (New Living Translation)

Don't miss Stonecreek's July 6th "Party on the Lawn." Buy your tickets Sunday at Stonecreek.

Billy Graham: If I Could Live Life Over, I Would...

"Parenting is the most important responsibility most of us will ever face, and none of us does it perfectly. If I could live life over again, I'd spend less time traveling and more time at home with Ruth and our children. Travel is an essential part of an evangelist's life (although less so with modern communications), but as I look back, I wonder if the countless trips I took were always necessary.

Recent studies suggest a child's character is largely shaped during their first six or eight years. I'm not surprised; almost three thousand years ago the Bible observed, 'Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it' (Proverbs 22:6)." - Billy Graham

Taken from The Journey: How To Live By Faith in an Uncertain World, chapter 27, "Passing the Baton," by Billy Graham, (c) 2006, Thomas Nelson Publishers.

After reading this book, I believe that every follower of Christ should read it and reference it often in their walk with God.

Clothes, Culture and Kids

So much of what we wear defines who we are. Even how we wear it portrays a certain image. (Ever see a 40 year old dressing like they are 18? You get the picture.) As my kids grow older--and image becomes increasingly more important to them and their peers, and what their peers think about them--I want to know how to guide them in making wise choices in clothing. We want to look good and fashionable, but as a parent, how do you instill soulish-level values in regards to dress? Isn't it just personal taste and sense of style?

I recently read a great article by John Piper on this subject. I've never really heard a message about how to view clothing from a biblical viewpoint. Most times, "religious" messages about clothing choices have a long list of prohibitions of brand names and reasons to boycott their corporate affiliations. That's not what this article is about. But it did cause me to stop and think about clothing and what my clothing says about my identity. And, as a parent, I want to be able to guide the heart of my children in helping them make clothing choices that are wise. Check out the article here.